I suppose this is the cosmos exacting revenge for my incredibly cruel (to my son, Mark) April Fools' prank. The pains started about a week and a half ago. A little twinge here, an hour of pain there. It would always relent though. Then came 8:00pm last Thursday evening. The pain hit yet again and this time decided to stay, so I left for the ER.
Yes, it's a stone. About 4mm in size. Nothing too cute, of course. The mention of the word "stone" conjurs to the mind a rock with smooth surfaces, glistening in the sunlight as the creek water rushes over it. Google "pictures of kidney stones" and see how scary they can really be!
I had made a promise, written in blood, that I would never go through this experience ever again in life! The first and last kidney stone I had was the same one. I was 7 months pregnant with Mark, nearly 14 years ago and this one was the size of an M&M. A plain chocolate one, not the peanut or almond ones. Anyone ever notice that they tend to compare it with something so inocuous that it sounds like it should be a pleasant experience? I ended up with a nephrostomy tube in my kidney for 3 months!
What is a nephrostomy you ask? Well, this is what they do when there is a little bambino in the oven and they can't do anything else to/for you. They insert a tube through your back, and stop every few millimeters to ultrasound where the tube is, until it is inserted in the kidney. Let me just say, that this is done with no anesthesia and hurts like a very hot place.
The tube is attached to a little pouch that is connected to a very cute, stretchy "belt" that is worn under the shirt and fills up with your, you guessed it, urine! Anytime I went shopping I was afraid that the store security would think I was shoplifting and that I would, at some point, get to lift up my shirt and show them my cache of stolen goods.
Right now I have four prescriptions added to my daily routine. One of the prescriptions, Flomax, is routinely prescribed to men with enlarged prostates. Are we trying to tell me something? Brittany has been having a little fun with me and saying that I may come out with a lower voice when all is said and done.;)
I've got to go now. I need to make a quick run to the store and buy a "tea strainer".
2 years ago
5 comments:
You made my day. I love how you explain life's trials. Hope you are feeling better. P.S. Write that book!
I'm sorry friend! I hope it passes SOON, take care.
Wow, sorry to hear that! Good luck with all that, I'll be thinking of you and will keep you in my prayers. I loved your April Fools Day joke . . . it happened to me in real life just last October, ugh! Long story and will have to explain it all later.
I'm so sorry Charmen! Stones are no fun. I got taken to the ER with one once, but it was no M&M size. Wow! I hope it passes quickly. Have fun straining. :)
Hi there, hows it going? We are doing alright. We sold our house and now were excepting our 3rd boy! Tell Lee hi for me.
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